Recently the biggest news on the television is about the K-Pop singer Kim Jong Hyun suicidal case. He left a note saying that he felt “broken from inside” and his depression has taken over his body where he couldn’t defeat it anymore.
I am not a big fan of Kim Jong Hyun but I feel sad because he is not very lucky like me. I was once a victim of depression but I might be at the very early stage because with the encouragement and advice from my colleague, I manage to go thru my bad time and I manage to escape out from the dark box.
Why do I say I was once a victim of depression because I was going through the list of the 10 Common symptoms of depression
- Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.
- Loss of interest in daily activities. You don’t care anymore about former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.
- Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.
- Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning or oversleeping.
- Anger or irritability. Feeling agitated, restless, or even violent. Your tolerance level is low, your temper short, and everything and everyone get on your nerves.
- Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.
- Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.
- Reckless behaviour. You engage in escapist behaviours such as substance abuse, compulsive gambling, reckless driving, or dangerous sports.
- Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions or remembering things.
- Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.
When I was going thru the symptoms, I realise out of 10 symptoms, 8 symptoms are happening to me. I do enjoy being alone, I hate communicate with people, I don’t want to meet people. My mind is full of negativity, I hate my life so much. Whatever happening I will always think is bad. I always feel that if tomorrow god ends my life, I will just accept it because I am useless.
Found some of the images of quotation how depression victim feels..
Thank god, I am lucky because an angel who is very patient has guided me throughout this bad and negative moment. She introduces me to a book. A book that once a while I will still open up and read it to remind myself to always be gratitude and be grateful for everything that I have now. The book is Super Life Secret codes by Master Sun. So now, every day I am reminding myself to be gratitute because life is very simple. Each time when I wanted to get angry, I will try to change my mindset to positive mindset. I still practising the Super Life Secret Codes because is seriously not very easy. It sounds easy when you are reading but when you are asked to apply it to your life, you often overlook and your bad habit will re-appear. Thank you my angel, thank you Master Sun.
I sincerely pray for Kim Jong Hyun, and hope you rest in peace now in another world. I hope those with similar symptoms please seek help and advic the from expert or talk to your close friends and family before is too late as it will be very difficult to escape from the dark box if you are too deep inside.